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Board 8 RAP BATTLE V One Loss Round 1
The first Round 'of the '''One Loss Bracket '''of the 'Board 8 RAP BATTLE 5 Tournament. ''~Round 1~ Battle L1: Anri vs. XIII ~The Score~ Princess Anri: 5 XIII is cool: 2 ~The Raps~ Princess Anri Alright, XIII, the wait is over for the Princess of Whales My rhymes overweight cause they tippin the scales Maybe I should get them checked for diabetes type 2 Baby you about to get decked cause the treaties fell through Literally, the floorboards gave in due to my glandular condition But the scoreboards still say that this s***'s a demolition After the peace talks, you'll be anonymous like Guy Fawkes Like 2 obese hawks, rhymes synonymous with fat squawks I think you get my points: my rhymes are big boned yet firm My verses got weak joints, my muscles are toned like a worm You can't handle this gravy I'm spitting, this s***'s way too thick You better go join the navy, it's befitting, cause I'm Moby Dick XIII The artist known as XiC will deign He'll mingle with losers to start his reign As the chief, the king, the f***ing God of rap On that subject, b****, your "king" seems a bit crap Nadal was beaten, bloodied, his flaws exposed Like your game with ladies when you get friendzoned It's funny to me how you love a 'roided fraud When no pills can get you past this rap battle lord Your game is whack, your groundstrokes are off and your lob is heavy no stamina either so you only sleep with your teddy You know I'm the master and that you're just my b**** Just accept it cuz we all know my rhymes bewitch Princess Anri I put back big macs by the ton, breakin scales just for fun My slacks always undone, forsaking buttons one by one I measure my waistband by miles instead of inches Gonna get your face banned if your head even flinches You're already shaking in terror, my mass inspires dread It was a grave, grave error picking the bottom bunk bed This b**** is going down, you'd best be on your guard My weight is growing now, I think I can feel more lard I think it's time I try a lyrical diet before my arteries congest One line less, might as well try it, my body's too stressed I'm trying to be satirical, so quiet while I go into cardiac arrest XIII Don't care about your weight b**** your rhymes are anorexic You're such a bad wordsmith you almost seem dyslexic jp was fatter ''and phatter than you When you take the stage the crowd just goes "boo" Your raps are shameful, just a gimmick like the Wii So why don't you take a seat and listen to me Admit I'm the teacher and you're in first grade And now I see your gold star starting to fade Cuz this battle's a cynch, man, I've got it made A formality before I go get laid Hey, you might too, but it'll only be incest I'ma just call you the "biggest loser", Princess. Battle L2: Menji vs. Blur ~The Score~ Menji76: Wins by DQ XtremeBlur: Forfeits ~The Raps~ Menji my name's in the sky while your marquee's fadin' out flashing your name as 'blurb' wishing for just one shout-out sign dropped the B 'cause you can't cover that electric fee people call you 'blur' now, you can call me mr. 1080p i've seen your rhymes, they're unreadable, like pencil on ice there're no surprises, you're a book I've already read twice if we're talking literature, i'm the kama sutra for sure shock the crowd now but my name will be sure to endure like a game of 'Guess Who?' you're good for one nostalgia spree too bad you'd be flipped down if asked, "did he beat menji?" i may have lost once but now i'm like jackie chan not wanting trouble unbeatable and waiting for your rebuttal, i'm thinking, you'll struggle Blur n/a Battle L3: MePieThree vs. warning_crazy ~The Score~ Me Pie Three: 4 Warning Crazy: 1 ~The Raps~ Me Pie Three Its your turn to take finals now cuz this is your final round Special sauce like silk off the spool rhyming with my vinyl sound I Baptise b****es boldly with bust to block from brimstone Bunnies with bras bursting with bust are blessed to blow my bone Barbariously i ball em, playmates with shock collars Like skip ball-less or skee-lo ya wish you were a baller Yea n I'm taller, theres 12 inches you cant see though Im like an iceberg, 90% of me's down be-low And if im an ice flow then youre frozen in your tracks Im in your path to the top n you cant pass me like Snorlax Its okay that I'm tired cuz your flows alarming like a poke flute. Wait for when it wakes me up, i'll crush your dreams like Exeggcute warning_crazy I wait three days for your rap and that’s all you got? I’m about to knock you out of the comp in one shot Your rhymes were a disaster; quick, you call a pastor Cause I’m a rapping master and my grooves are faster I’ll do you a huge favor and beat you down real quick But after I’m done with you you’ll be feeling dyspeptic They call you special sauce but your flow is your albatross I tried to find how it rhymed but it kept leaving me at a loss When the results are shown your mommas gonna mourn Until she finally catches you watching all that porn After that she’ll probably wish that you had been stillborn But for right now you are just a speck in my side, a thorn Me Pie Three Once bitten, twice shy, you couldnt swing a single punch Thrice beaten, my oh my, I can write a winner over brunch Yeah, Snorlax just woke up and I'm level one hundred Full health now, and I'll eat you twice like Fun Dip Your a "Lik a Stik" and Im like "bro have restraint" Its one thing to be gay, another to love a mans taint Surprising Ash with your girth? I guess its your prerogative But taking c*** unquantitive? Disgustingly evocative. I heard you wanted to get raped in jail so you sought a conviction You got a problem, go on MTVs "my strange addiction" Join Snooki and friends but remember herp is passed via dome I guess AIDS stands for Allow Infinite D***s Syndrome warning_crazy Alright not a lotta time so i'll just crank this out When i'm done you'll have a major vote drought you keep trying to call me gay, in ways that get more risque i guess i'll enter the fray, you know that i always slay i'm starting to think that your projecting, or maybe injecting the lack of work is reflecting, the crowds be objecting you must have been high to think those lines were working Man get the hell off the board, please go back to lurking but we all can agree, that special sauce has autolatry i'll win, i can guarantee, theres a reason you better flee you hear that? not one clap, and for you i'll recap I really don't have time to read your crap, **** it, that's a wrap Battle L4: swordsman 12 vs. Tombolo ~The Score~ swordsman 12: 4 Tom Bombadil: 1 ~The Raps~ swordsman Smash boards and drop jaws, I’m rap’s Blake Griffin Stop, rewind, pause… now loop it like I’m GIF’in. Can’t stop my trajectory, fly high like I’m in Sector Z, Your tournament is over, unfortunate to battle me. Don’t expect an upset, my rhymes makin’ your mom wet Your **** stinks so bad it clears the room like a bomb threat. The Party’s winding Down before you even got your first set, Your career is over *****-- “are we having fun yet?” Strike below the belt, breaking balls like vasectomy, My heat is radiating while you can’t detect yours rectally. Reject attempts to lecture me cause I’ll be this round’s teacher, This ain’t Sunday School but I’d suggest you get your preacher. Tom We've gathered to dishonor the soon-to-be dearly departed: He was begging me for mercy before the match even started. I'll give the last rites now, for once you've been outsmarted A weak-ass fool and his life are inevitably parted. And the Miracle never happen- you know there will be no upset Taki' you down with my rappin'- son, I aint even warmed up yet Once my synapses start zappin' you won't even know what's up, get A clue, get to clappin', 'cuz this is gonna be game set. I'll be having my way with you all over the boards Gonna ruin your day like raiding Mongol hordes Every single day my rap is winning awards, But even Fighter would say that he doesn't like swords. swordsman Named after a poet but your flow is ****ing pitiful, Your raps are damn predictable, can’t knock me off the pinnacle, Master of the syllable, shows I put on are clinical, If this is the Departed I’m the cop and you’re the criminal. Think you’re ****in clever before I Mark you with my nine, You need more than just a little luck—the stars have to align. Like Carol in HR you’re not all there, that **** was empty, This just aint your Day Man, your play just isn’t trendy. You must be sniffin' glue if you thought that trash was treasure, Now’s your chance to DQ and vanish quick like cheshire. But I’m the one who’s laughing at your tourney hopes crashing, My journey’s making waves and you’re stuck in the mud splashing. Tom This is a battle of rhymes, but you came unarmed Rap a thousand times, I'd never be harmed With charisma and ease, I've got ladies charmed Better than Chinese with all the gold I've farmed. Your swords and rhymes are dull, neither one could cut butter No need to fight at full to kick you into the gutter. You're a puny-ass lizard, I've got the Boomerang Cutter Conjurin' rhymes like a wizard, you're spewing crap like a nutter. Gonna snipe you with my Bow, gonna skewer with my Lance Even my Axe can lay you low, and my Dancers gonna Dance. Got the Emblem of a hero, it'll leave you in a trance Now your HP are at zero 'cuz you looked at me askance. Battle L5: Justin vs. Bio ~The Score~ Justin Crossing: Forfeits Bio: Wins by DQ ~The Raps~ Justin n/a Bio Thanks for the bye, JC, I can go easy on my lungs Since i don't have to try I'm gonna rap in tongues oqhfrrqzcxkjbaofbaeboabjdlv pefhpfhpaihfnviadbnvibvohfig paiewhfhpjjifoishoiehiofoisbe iohfovikbsiodubeiveohbfiuwe woahhadiuadiadfigasrto oahiusuygdiauhojpygufo pojsfposehnfosheifheoihsgo oihgerohshosgosiheosho weuoiqiowoiweoiuquoikjbik oiheohioiaownskcm Tom Selleck Battle L6: Ayvuir vs. BBallman7 ~The Score~ Ayvuir: Forfeits BBallman7: Wins by DQ ~The Raps~ Ayvuir n/a BBallman ****in' DQ you gotta be kiddin' me, Doesn't change nothin', you're an easy victory. If you spent as much time writin as you did makin' excuses, Then you could have lost like a man and not been so ****'in useless. By why even sign up if 12 lines are too much for you, I'm only doin' 6 because I've had enough of n00bs. Battle L7: Mer vs. Walrus ~The Score~ Mer: - WalrusJump: - ~The Raps~ Mer n/a Walrus Yo Keisha Fabo lookin ass can't even drop 12 bars I'd have burned you like MJ - your brain would have been charred You as fat as Breadquanda, but I'm your ghetto superstar Yo s*** Earthbound like you're Ness, I'm out of this world, I'm from Mars B**** please, you can't stop me, you're too afraid to show up You whiter than Brian Scalabrine, I'm Shaq O'Neal on post up You're ratchet as Lil Kim, I'll f*** your raps so hard my name's BIG How can you be user of the year when I broke your ass like a twig? This battle's over - literally - you didn't even come You knew I'd destroy you like a Friday Night bottle of rum I'm half-assing these four lines - why show you any better? Why show respect by dropping a rap? I'd have still won posting a letter. Battle L8: jdizzy vs. ngirl ~The Score~ jdizzy: Wins by DQ ngirl: Forfeits ~The Raps~ jdizzy Swear to god this is the most mannish B**** I ever seen Vag getting soiled year round call it evergreen Couldnt pay a mex to landscape it, Juan more thing eat you in this battle like a p****, lick the plate clean. You dream of gettin this stick, way sick of toothpicks that dont fit and leave you feeling empty like yo rhymes chick But dont trip, i wont slip, anything in that slit It probably be more fun f****** a cup then your loose s*** My verses are phat, feel pain when they penetrate your cranium gag on mouthfuls of syllables and verbs im slayin em If what I spit were STDs then maybe you could CATCH-it but only cause your nasty you stank whore ratchet. ngirl . jdizzy . ngirl . See Also * Main Bracket Round 1 * Main Bracket Round 2 * Main Bracket Round 3 * Back to the Standings and Results page